Grief & Bereavement Support

There is no checklist for grief. It is a deeply personal, powerful, and often chaotic process. The purpose of this section is to help understand what feelings are common, to normalise the experience, and to show where free, compassionate support can be found. It is a journey that does not have to be faced alone.

If feelings are overwhelming, or there is a need to speak to someone right now, please use the numbers below. Support is available 24/7, and it is free, confidential, and non-judgemental.

Understanding the terms can help frame the experience.

• Mind: The mental health charity Mind defines bereavement as the experience of losing someone important. Grief is the process and range of emotions that are experienced as a result of that loss.
• NHS: The NHS makes an important distinction: grief is not an illness. It is a natural response to loss. While grief can have physical symptoms, most people who are grieving do not need to visit their GP, as it is not a medical condition. However, support is available for anyone struggling to cope.

Grief affects every part of life, emotions, thoughts, and physical wellbeing. There is no right way to grieve. Experts at the NHS and Mind identify a wide range of common experiences. It is possible to feel some, all, or none of these, and for them to change from day to day.

Emotional Feelings

• Shock and Numbness: This is often the first reaction, a feeling of being in a daze. This is a natural protective response.
• Overwhelming Sadness: This can come with a lot of crying, or feeling low and hopeless.
• Anger: It is very common to feel angry at the situation, at the illness, at others, or even at the person who has died.
• Guilt: Feelings of guilt are common, such as guilt about things said or unsaid, or bargaining thoughts like 'If only I had...'.
• Anxiety and Panic: A loss can make the world feel less safe, leading to anxiety or even panic attacks.
• Relief: If the person was in pain or suffering for a long time, or if the relationship was difficult, it is normal to feel a sense of relief alongside sadness.

Many people have heard of the 5 stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. The NHS notes this model, but it is crucial to understand that grief is not a linear process.

These are not stages to be completed in order. It is common to move between them, skip them, or experience them all at once. The NHS describes grief as potentially feeling chaotic and out of control. Thinking of grief as a series of stages can create unhelpful pressure, as if there is a right way to do it. A more helpful way to see it is as a series of waves that come and go, which eventually become less intense over time.

For most people, the intensity of grief will ease over time. However, for a small number of people, these debilitating feelings can last for many months or years, making it hard to return to everyday life. This is known as Prolonged Grief Disorder or complicated grief. Symptoms can include very difficult feelings of sadness or guilt lasting over 6 months, and an inability to return to everyday activities. If this is the case, it is important to seek professional help, starting with a GP or by self-referring to NHS talking therapies.